Friday, 15 February 2013

Love & Bottle

Here is another story published this week by 3am magazine.
I sent this to Alan a while ago, it's come out for Valentines day.

Love & Bottle

By Alan McCormick & Jonny Voss.









Pass the bottle old girl.
Mine, all mine.
Come on, give us a slug, woman, I’m spitting up fur balls.
I was here first.
Share and share alike, why don’t ya?
No, it’s all mine, loser.
Who’s you calling loser?
You, you fuck beard.
What if I say please?
You’d be a fucking loser who says please.
Give me the effing bottle or I’ll thrash you with me shoe!
That’s more like it.
Yea? Well give it here then.
You only needed to shout and threaten a little. Here you are.
I don’t like to, babe . . . oh God, it’s lovely. You have some too.
Don’t mind if I do.
Bloody lovely it is, girl.
You ain’t wrong, love, it’s so bloody lovely I could cry.
I’ve got a tear in my eye as it happens.
Sentimental old fart
Give us a kiss then.
All right but hold me too, lips not tits, and don’t scratch with your whiskers.
Like this?
Yea . . . oh yea, like this.



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